Weekend Recap - GOOD WEEKEND - Family Time!!

Last Thursday I was in a fairly good mood. Went to see George and that was nice…he almost always makes me feel positive and hopeful. Thursday evening I biked 20 miles in less than an hour. It was a group ride but Uwe and I ended up doing most of it with just us two. Averaging over 20 mph when you are NOT in a pack is hard work. After the bike I had a few beers (that I counted in my calorie count – GO ME) and enjoyed our little social gathering in the parking lot. I went home in a GREAT mood. I managed to stay in a positive loving mood all weekend too.

Saturday we finally accomplished a real family outing and it went very well. Husband was patient and affectionate with both me and Beanie all day. We toured a few local caves and had swim time at the river. Beanie said her favorite thing was seeing the bats in the cave. She was very inquisitive and well behaved all day.

The car ride home from the cave.

Sunday I biked with a group of awesome friends which totally hit the spot. After that I hustled up a friend with a truck to move a desk for Monster. He had a month to do it and did NOT …which totally hacked me off but it was a free desk and in good shape and I could not bear to see it go in the trash. I just left it in his driveway. Later he texted to thank me and say it is awesome and fits perfectly in his room. Glad I made the effort and had Kevin to help me out.

Sunday afternoon husband biked and I made a huge effort to get to the lake for a swim. I had to find a babysitter for Beanie, drop her off, drive 20 minutes to the lake. I only swam half a mile so I was done in about 25 minutes. I chatted up a few friends who also swam before driving back to town to pick up the kid and then home to shower. All in all it was too much darn time and effort for a swim that left me with goggle eyes for the next 5 hours. THIS IS WHY I DON’T SWIM OFTEN. Even if I had a pool handy it would dry my skin out badly and give me goggle eyes every time I swam. BUMMER because it is a good low impact cardio activity and I really would like to improve my swim times.

As soon as we got cleaned up Beanie and I headed to Valarie’s & Carrie’s house for social time. We had a great evening. The girls played, me and Valarie drank wine and chatted each other’s ears off. It was 9 before I knew it and we rushed home. I think Daddy enjoyed his alone time while we were gone. I hope the introvert recharged while I was busy getting a good social fix.

Therapy

Today at lunch time I went for a swim.  As I was swimming the length of this ¼ mile lake, I had plenty of time to think.  I was thinking about husband and how he behaves and how he has all these issue that he won’t actually fix and how he really just expects the rest of the world to get over it. 

His way of dealing with things is to ignore them and pretend they don’t exist; which makes it really hard on me because if I try to discuss an issue, he can’t discuss it or he would actually be admitting it exists.

He does from time to time admit he is a jerk.  He likes to say he is an only child so he can’t help being selfish.  Another favorite line is he was born an introvert so he can’t help being antisocial and not connecting with others.....it's in his DNA so out of his control.

On some level I guess he has accepted who he is and that is good? 

Do I think he really is happy with who he is? No, I really don’t.  He spends too much time pretending to be someone he is not.  He fully believes in not letting anyone see the real him.  He just puts on the “right” act for the situation he is in.

But really, not admitting that you have issues, not working on those issues, not trying to do better is just ridiculous.  I mean at least be man enough to say I can do better and I should do better and I will try.

In the final analysis, I think if he really feels that he need to pretend to be someone he is not so much maybe he needs to ask himself if some self improvement or therapy may be in order.  I think meds might be a great help to his mood swings. 

Admit that you have issues and do something about it, don’t just try to hide them and fake your way through life!

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on a side note.......swimming is a great time to think because there are NO distractions!  It reminds me of when I wake up at 3 am and the house is quiet and dark and I have such great clear thoughts.  If only the goggles did not leave marks on my face, I could learn to love swimming.  LOL

Triathlon Update

Last night at bed time, Husband and Beanie left to go visit G&G.  I enjoyed some quit time alone in bed with a glass of wine, the TV tuned to some dumb chick flick and my cell phone texting my friends.  (Living large I know)

I woke up with a crick in my neck thanks to so many pillows in our bed because Husband has been trying to sleep upright.  Later when I told Husband about my pains he laughed and said it must really suck to have a “sleeping related injury”.  Aint he funny.

I ate an Eggo waffle, threw some chicken in the crock-pot, fed the dog and dashed to my morning ride.  45 miles later, I pulled on my running shoes for my first ever “brick” other than nationals in 2006.  At first my legs did feel weird, but in no time my stride was fine and I felt good other than the sun blasting 90+ degrees on my head.  After a few miles I considered the experiment a success.  My feet hurt but they weren’t too bad.  I think I could run 13 miles after a 56 mile bike.  It will hurt, there is no doubt, but what’s the worst thing that could happen?  I might end up hobbling or walking the last few miles.  No biggy, that is how my first half marathon ended.

Then, Mark informed me that I would not be allowed to wear my music at the triathlon!!!  WHAT?  This, my friend, is not a good thing.  My mind will not be happy to actually run for over 2 hours with no music to distract it.  See, here is where the mental aspect is the hardest part.  I know my body can do it; it’s my mind that is the week link.  Haven’t registered yet….there is still time to decide.

After our run, there was much talk of breakfast foods so Uwe and I decided to head back to his place and make our own ham, egg and cheese on a muffin.  I used pepper cheese and they totally rocked.  After that, we watched some TV and had a beer.  Anyone ever see the show Alaska the Last Frontier on Discovery?  It’s about the Kilcher family and what their life in Alaska is like.  It’s cheesy cause it’s very staged but still fascinating.

It was after noon when I finally arrived home and was super happy that my chicken was done cooking.  I threw some vegetables in a pot and got to doing all my weekend chores as fast as I could.  I wanted to go swim at 4 and needed to start getting ready at 3 because the lake is a pretty good drive.  They keep telling me it is the BEST lake in town so I was really excited.

I carpooled to the swim with Stina and her husband and although the beach left a little to be desired…..like there is no beach.  The water was clear and the lake is really long so that means less laps and more uninterrupted swim time.  Today my goal was to focus on breathing on both sides. 

Here is a picture of what my Garmin records for me when I use it to swim.  I now know that if I swim this lake back and forth twice….that’s two laps, it is about 1.2 miles; the same amount I need for my half distance triathlon.

Everyone else swam one lap but Stina and I did two.  I was thrilled when the second lap felt better than the first.  I hope to start sneaking out at lunch time to swim.  Swimming is my weakness and I need to work on that so I can feel comfortable about this race.  I can’t actually call it a race.  I won’t be racing…I just want to finish.  I will call it an accomplishment, not a race.

After the swim a few of us sat around and chatted.  It was a nice evening out once the sun got a bit lower.  Soon I headed home to wait for my family to return.  I dub the day a huge success.

I CAN Swim!

Monday after work I usually hang out with my daughter.  During the school year she takes ballet class but right now she is on summer break from that.  So this last Monday after work we headed to the lake to see if Mama can swim.  (Don’t tell anyone, but I am seriously considering doing a half iron man distance triathlon.)

The last time I swam any distance was in 2006 when I was training for our multisport club national’s competition.  That fall, I did my first and only triathlon near Las Vegas; the swim was in Lake Mead.  I will never be fast enough to actually win and individual award in a triathlon but it is still fun to go to nationals and earn points for participating which helps our club get some recognition.

Anyhow, I had decided that if I didn’t enjoy the swim…or if I struggled too much, I would not be attempting the half ironman distance.  However, much to my surprise after a ¼ of a mile, I found a groove and felt pretty good.  I actually enjoyed it and felt comfortable.  So I think I have the ability I just need to refine my skills a bit.  I know a lot about running and cycling and have been doing each of them passionately for years however; I have not swum much since I was kid. 

Thank God my mother insisted I take tons of swimming lessons and join the local swim team when I was young.  I am so grateful that I am not afraid of water and I can swim any stroke and feel competent.